19/10/2008

today, we celebrate my grandma's birthday. she ald 80sth. all kins come and celebrate with her, can imagine how happy is....but i feel very very very bored!!!!!! i can say that i and their relationship is bad even my family. i have ald few month din talk with my brother since we quarreled....the relationship of my parents and i also not u thought that good. ---"impassive". i think i'm the only one who ignored by all. Because of this, my dear n i going more intimate and our affectionate bond being more tight and stable. i knew i can't have this thinking but it reality. it forced by environmental. my cognitive show tis massage for me. i also feel incapable. they dun like i out for whole day = wanna i always stay at home...for what????? what can i do at home??? nobody talk to me, always facing laptop--non living being!!! i wan somebody listen to me and talk to me, i wan laugh and smile, it won't happen when i at home, but it do when he is beside.

i dun mind how ppl felt about us, i really satisfy i got him, coz he can give me warm and secure me. He is the only one who really listen to me and care bout me. love u soooooooooooo mucchh, my lovest!!!!!